I dont know what it is, but a part of me just can’t get you out of my head. Literally. For the past 7 years I’ve thought about you every single day. Some good thoughts, some bad, and almost everything in between. I can’t help but to wonder how often you think of me, and if you think about how different our lives would be if we had ended up together. Y'know after we both somewhat got ourselves figured out. We were young, we didn’t know any better at the time. But here we are still, with 2,500 odd miles between us. Apart. And here I still am thinking of you, thinking of us. I can’t help but to feel guilty, lying in a separate bed, unable to get you off my mind. There’s just something about you and the way you’ve got my heart in your hands, the way you’ve touched my soul, the way you understand how my mind works. I lay here every night and can’t help but wonder what we could’ve been. Could we still be something? Maybe in a different life.

codienedaydreams:

You probably won’t see this, but I can’t bring myself to tell you directly. Mostly because we’re both in a spot know in our lives that it wouldn’t change much anyway. But for the better part of 6 years now you’ve been in my life, even when we weren’t talking you were still my person, my safe space. I still can’t help to think that maybe we were split from the same atom and separated by a whole country.  Because honestly, no one has ever understood me the way you do, and if soul mates are a real thing, I believe you are mine, even if it’s just platonic. Looking back, I’ve grown a lot, and you have too. And I know it’s been a long time, but I still am sorry for all the pain I put you through. I know it was for the best that we split, because we both had so much growing and learning to do. But for some reason, I still can’t get you out of my head sometimes, not even in a romantic way, but I think part of me just yearns for the friendship that we had, the connection, the talking every day about anything and everything, the checking in, the even though we’re roughly 2,500 miles a part, I’m still here for you. I miss it. And I miss you, and I still love you, even if it is in a different way now. You’re always going to be someone that I care about and I just want you to know that.

- I wish I could tell you this myself.

5/15

codienedaydreams:

“To her new lover, She loves the sky. The stars. The moon. The universe. All of it. So if she stops and points up at the clouds, stand there with her while she snaps a picture. Listen to her crazy thoughts about all the little things that run through her mind, no matter how bizarre they may seem. She has the most wonderful mind, you should feel honoured to get to hear all her thoughts. She loves poetry. Writing and reading it. She might not write as much anymore, but don’t ever let her stop. If she lets you read it, you better pay close attention to every word. What she’s got down on that paper is what she won’t say out loud at times. You should feel lucky to be able to get insight as to what she’s thinking. She’ll forget things. Don’t make fun of her for it or tell her “she’s lucky she’s cute” Because while she is definitely cute, she’s also got so much running through her mind. She’s human, people forget things. Dont make her feel bad for that. And while we’re talking about forgetting things, she’ll forget to eat at times too. Make sure to remind her occasionally. She most likely won’t ask to be reminded of things, because she doesn’t want to be a bother, but sometimes she’ll need it. Be sure to ask her if there’s anything that she needs help with remembering. She gets scared sometimes. Now this fear can range anywhere from her feeling like there may be a bug in her bed too being scared to death of her waking up one morning and you being gone. Don’t treat either like they’re irrational or silly. Be there to comfort her and reassure her that everything is okay. She’s been through a hell of a lot and struggled with many different things. Make sure you respect her boundaries and the way she feels about things. Don’t push her into doing something that she isn’t fully comfortable with. Don’t treat her like she’s being childish or tell her that she should just let things happen. Don’t smoke, drink, or do anything to cause yourself or her harm. All those bad vices have caused so much trouble already, don’t let that ruin things. Trust me, its not worth it. And most importantly, love her. Love her with all your heart, and don’t you dare break her heart. Make sure you remind her of how much you love her and appreciate her. Tell her how beautiful and how perfect she is, how she doesnt need to change for anybody. Hold her hand. Kiss her. Make her feel safe. Make her feel at home in your arms. Be there to talk with her about the universe at 4 in the morning. Write her love notes. Take silly pictures with her. Dance around and sing with her, be silly. Make her smile. Never let her go to bed upset. You better take care of her and make sure you let her know just how lovely she really is. I hope you realize just how lucky you are. This girl that you get to call yours, she’s like no other. She’s got such a wonderful mind and the biggest heart, full of love. And let me tell you, when she loves… she loves with everything she’s got. So when she tells you she’s yours, you’ve got all of her.”

— Sincerely, a name you’ll hear on occasion.